it's impossible to clean my email

my yahoo mail is practically flooded with junk. i like to send myself email attachments but i never download or look or name my files properly. sai lahhh. how?? but i dun wanna delete!!! i think i will take an entire free month just to finish sorting. good gawd.

on a side note, after reading a few msn conversations that i saved, i finally realise...

1. i did get angry very easily OoO
2. i sounded like i was on a constant bushuang mood (joking or not i sounded like that)
3. i didn't sound half assed much like a female

wow. i feel very uncomfortable with the knowledge that i was such an easily agitated being. wowww i'm so glad i cut away at least 80% of the things that agitate me easily. it has reduced so significantly! i feel like a new leaf!

that aside, i don't know why i was so easily angry sia. so weird. it almost seemed like my personality was different! hmm. i was very inflexible and i tended to focus on only one direction. in fact i came to a very quick decision of what i didn't want. and i seldom entertained possibilities OoO

omg looking back it must have been a real pain in the ass to talk to me!

on the other hand, the one consistency that remains is that i don't really like people trying to confirm whether i'm angry or not, and even more so if they don't take my word for it when i say not really. hahaha. it's just a quirk.

sigh. i really don't like the way i handled stuff in the past. no wonder my mother said i was an extremist. i wonder what changed the way i handle things? i guess i must've banged into walls far too frequently until it occurred to me i was being masochistic?

i don't feel so terrible about the things that happened to me. i feel far worse realising i was the problem. it just..it suddenly feels like i can understand why so many take it out on other people simply because they are too ashamed of their own being, whether they realise it or not. i don't accept their actions, but i guess the least bit i can do is just to understand them, even if i am angry with them.

...it's time like this that fills me with so much regret.

how? should i just close one eye and ignore everything that's happened and move on? or should i go on prying into my past written stuff and accept all that's happened? the latter makes me feel horrible. how??

oh and btw, the stuff happened for quite some time liao. maybe starting from 2003, and ended only some time one or two years back, i think.

i love puzzle quest!

so i did a random search.

AHHHH it had a ps2 version in year 2007 and i missed it!!! i am so sad!!!!

but at the same time i found it has a DS and a WII version!!! 8DDD

i'm not sure about DS since there are people complaining that the game has poor controls due to poor size compared to psp and the AI is as lame as it can get, but WII? i believe it will be there long enough for me to get! 8D shall read reviews in the future.

it was rated 8.5 on gamespot! which is good 8D

that reminds me. final fantasy series tends to get a minimum of 9.0. i think it was 9.7 for ff7 and 9.8 for ff8. not sure lah. but what i so totally agree with is 10.0 for chrono cross 8D ohhh loves.

i still haven't managed to pull myself through chrono trigger. i never thought i'd be beaten by games with far too old gameplay and graphics. i've tried ff5 and ff6 (or at least i think those were the series) but i couldn't take it. too inflexible and too boring. UGH i never thought i'd lose to these games!!

i think ps1 generation of RPGs were really wonderful though. i hope future game producers don't forget the plot twists and 'common sense'-based gameplay are what makes a game the gem it is. i wouldn't mind repeating playing 10 chrono crosses and 10 xenogears and 10 ... anyway please don't repeat xenogears disc 2...it was horrible. the WORST! sometimes i suspect disc 2 was written by a completely new writer cuz the former writer kena H1N1 or something. (do not question the logic of this. end of story.)

ok, now that i have Wild Arms in my psp, i have a new game to test ! YAY!

i want my ace prosecutor!

where is the friggin translation!? QUICK! i have waited for 4 mths!

meantime, i just completed my Fuushi Yuugi dating game, which wasn't a dating game after all. and of all characters i got, i only got Takiko as my closest friend. i wanted takumi. THAT'S IT! i'm going to come in between Uruki and Takiko and be the bad girl in the game that i should be!!! well it took me only three days to finish one storyline.. what the hell. it's just a friggin promotional game for the manga itself man!!

and i'm about done with mga 1 & 2... i've replayed them so many times that i don't get a kick out of them anymore. i want an mga3--interface of mga1, flexibility of mga2, and storyline of mgs 8D but it doesn't exist. emoness.

waiting for a new mgs game on psp! i dunno if it's out, and i haven't bothered to check.

i am currently downloading a dragon ball game on ds lite. it's called Origins. dl-ed both jap and eng for shuang. i wonder how it'll turn out. people say it's nice...i wonder if it's nicer than kh 328/2 days or something like that? i played it and felt that it was some kind of dry grinding game. well, it is lah. disappointtttment.

and i'm trying to get my hands on wild arms. apparently it is one of the only decent SPRGs on psp. i went to google for SRPGs on psp. sadly i have 60% of the games. are they the only good games on psP??? ...

i don't know if i should get field commander.. i saw the interface and i'm quite confused. yaddaaaa.

i can't believe someone recommended riviera or something like that. last i remember, it's a crap game.

ahhhghhh game dryness. to think mga1 and mga2 are now considered the top 5 games and i'm already through with them. noooo. no ness. nooo!

you'd think dissidia is nice. i played it. and realise it's just a fan series game. it's tragic. it was hyped. gan. but i'm getting the eng ver to try out anyway lah. last i tried was jap.

when are they going to create an SPRG for dragon ball? or is there already one? i want a solid storyline one man! best is it contains all the way from origins to Z end! i dun want GT though. yeah i'm a fan of dragon ball but GT is like some fanfiction gone "epic-ly" wrong. i like budokai but it's on ps2.

i want a puzzle quest sequel.

ok, enough game ramblings. time to eat and fight wooh!