OMG!
15 years ago
Showing posts with label boredom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label boredom. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Thursday, August 4, 2011
With my updated understanding of typology...
I'm going to start typing Metal Gear Solid Novel characters!!! Well, it's just very interesting to me...
Solid Snake: INTJ
Reason: I was torn between ISTP/INTJ, due to his apparently superior use of Se - quick to form judgments on what to do, quickly picks up hints and clues in the current context, and he considers his options within himself - very huge clue of the Ni/Se combo. He has utter lack of Si, and completely no signs of Fe - does not understand conversational roles, and ends up pissing off characters for "rejecting" conversation roles - classic way of pissing people off for non Fe-users, or even SJs who don't know him well enough. His emotions are very contained and he has no wish to be understood (strong signs of Fi). Also has a lack of Ti - has a tendency to draw information from his environment and organize them effective enough for action output, but seldom analyzes things for the sake of it, and discards principles and rules that make no sense.
Conclusion: No Ti/Fe, or Si/Ne. Has a strong introverted inclination. Not an F. By deduction, he's an INTJ.
Meryl Silverburgh: INFJ
Reason: Very clearly an Fe-user - classic clashes of Fe/Ti vs Te/Fi with Solid Snake. Has a strong urge to understand "why", and does not have a very strong attachment to the past - telling of a lack of Si. Like Snake, she has a tendency to work within context. Surpasses Snake in the department of analysis, but has a poorer judgment of what is necessary for the objective goal. Very competent on her own terms and engrossed in her own vision. She and Snake understand each other and are on the same page, but often come to different conclusions. After categorizing Snake as "on her side", she finds herself more easily agreeable with Snake - signs of Fe.
Conclusion: She could be an ENFJ, but has a comfortable use of Ti, indicating a tertiary position versus inferior position.
Roy Campbell: ISTJ/XXTJ
Reason: Actually, I don't know. He has Te/Fi preferences. It's hard to tell if he is an S/N or I/E. Considering his reserved nature, he seems to have introverted inclinations, and prefers to go slow and steady in his speech. His concerns are far more direct than Snake's, and he seems to use quite a bit of Si. Seems to have difficulty adjusting and jumping onto a situation as fast as Snake does.
Conclusion: By deduction again, he's an ISTJ.
Naomi Hunter: ISFP
Reason: Her motivations and reasons are very straightforward, and are actually rationalized, far more than Snake's. She does not relive past experiences - she carries her interpretations (Ni) of events with her and carries on to act on it. It's expected that an Fi-dom learns to control Fi-reflexes in a military background, but it's evident that her emotions catch up with her instantly as she observes Snake throughout the mission. She sees eye-to-eye with Snake, a common thing for Se/Ni and Ni/Se interacting parties, and that both have Te/Fi and Fi/Te makes the connection much easier, and Snake feels this profound connection; they get what each other is saying. She also sheds her past quickly and takes on a new conclusion after she understood things differently.
Conclusion: Her goals are straightforward and easy to understand, as is the case for most Se-Doms and -auxiliaries, versus Ni-Doms and -auxiliaries. No signs of Si/Ne. Her introversion shows very clearly.
Otacon: INTP
Reason: I had thought him to be an INFP, but the Ti preferences started to show later in the novel. He has a strong use of Ne/Si. At the back, he starts to show no signs of Fi at all - he uses Ti reasoning to determine the truth or falseness in a situation, and it even shows in the way he analyses his feelings for Sniper Wolf. At this juncture, he seeks Snake's second opinion, and Snake's Te/Fi reasoning about his feelings for Sniper Wolf confuses him. In MGS2, his relationship with E.E is also confused, and he tries to reason his way out, only to get even more confused. Strong Ti-Ne leads him to have less concerns about consequences.
Conclusion: His emotionally expressive demeanor was confusing at first, but eventually, the Ti reasoning gave way to a huge hint of his type. A rather unusual INTP.
Gray Fox: ISTP
Reason: Very hard to type. I suspect that he gets along with Naomi and Snake primarily because of the Se/Ni combination, and he shows very strong Se use. The Ti process in an ISTP is often difficult to see, but it shows in the manner in which they make decisions and carry out actions. He and Snake's interaction is unique, in that they both know they see the same things, but have a subtly different approach and conclusion. Not a complicated man, but definitely determined.
Conclusion: I might be off the track. Too little to work with, and the fact that he has a damaged persona makes it even harder; he could be ESTP.
Liquid Snake: ENTP
Reason: I don't know why people type him as an XNTJ - no signs of Ni/Se at all. Very outer world focused. He cooks up ideas on the fly, and uses a lot of Ti to back it up. Fe-tertiary in ENTPs tend to show in forms of reaction-monitoring and teasing - evident in his treatment to Solid Snake. A telling sign was when he assumed the existence of a vaccine to FoxDie - Snake questioned Liquid if there truly was a vaccine, but he merely said, "There has to be!" His motivations are also explained in a logical discourse; he mocked Naomi for her silly motivation for revenge, but when Snake pointed out the irony in his own motivation resembling Naomi's, he failed to address it and instead turned it against Snake ("Unlike you!"). His horrible assessment of combat actions to be taken during his control of Metal Gear REX is, to me, a strong indication of a total lack of Se.
Conclusion: I put his functions together, and then compared him to the three ENTPs I've ever known - they sound just like him: grand preachers of their whacked ideas. Entertaining, intelligent...but still whacked.
Sniper Wolf: ISTP
Reason: Her interaction style with Snake is curiously similar to what it is like between Gray Fox and Snake. She has an obvious preference for Ti. Also very adaptive to her current circumstance, indicating use of Se. Her devotion to her ideals tells a Ti-Dom. She and Otacon probably understand each other from the Ti/Fe perspective, but have different conclusions because of the Se/Ni and Ne/Si divide.
Conclusion: Could be completely off the track, since there's too little to go on with. But I can't see her as an Si or a Te user.
Decoy Octopus: The famous XXXX type
Reason: The seventeenth type, because we get to see him only in his afterlife.
Conclusion: I wrote this for fun.
Vulcan Raven: Some...Si-user (XSXJ)
Reason: He is...just weird... Too weird to type. He uses a crap load of Si. He talks too much and he's...I don't know...just weird. He seems absolutely terrible at contingencies, so it's hard to tell if he uses Te/Ti. Seems to be somewhat out of it a lot. He seems a bit like an ISFJ to me, but I really don't know.
Conclusion: The Shaman who can't stop talking about his culture. Has his roots in a very concrete manner, so I doubt that he's an N.
Psycho Mantis: INTP
Reason: I thought about this for a while. His personal ideals are unemotional in nature despite the emotional roots. Has a stronger use of Si compared to Liquid, and his ideals via Ti are of utmost importance. Lack of Se. For some totally random reason, he just had to torment Snake with hallucinations and delusions, a period in which he could simply just whack life out of Snake - seems like a whacked Fe projection or something...or just Ne on the loose.
Conclusion: He has very little consideration for consequences, and simply follows his reasoning. Everything that's happening around him is of little relevance to him - something xNTPs share in common, but often unintentionally.
Revolver Ocelot: ISFJ
Reason: This one was interesting to type. On first glance, it's easy to think of him as an NT, but on further observation of his general conduct, he's a heavy Si and Ti user, and definitely has Fe. The fight between him and Snake in the room with Baker is very interesting, in that Ocelot kept talking about history, and has a tendency to explain his preferences in Ti style - he complained of Snake's SOCOM ("Hah! Everybody uses SOCOM..."), went on to talk about his SAA (despite the disadvantage of slow reload time), and used Ti to figure out how to use the SAA best suited to himself - oddly a behavior reminiscent of Meryl (INFJ: Ti-tertiary), who also explained to Snake her preference for the Desert Eagle and how she had learnt to suit it to herself. He seems to find Snake irritating to talk to, in once again, typical Te/Fi and Fe/Ti conflict. I suspect that Snake has no clue why Ocelot is talking so much to him.
Conclusion: His cognitive functions are the same as INTP, and I had considered him an INTP, but he's a lot more concrete and less flexible in his approach to changes. Interesting, he sees eye-to-eye with Liquid, who shares the same function.
That...was very satisfying to type. What a strangely good way to improve my mood.
Solid Snake: INTJ
Reason: I was torn between ISTP/INTJ, due to his apparently superior use of Se - quick to form judgments on what to do, quickly picks up hints and clues in the current context, and he considers his options within himself - very huge clue of the Ni/Se combo. He has utter lack of Si, and completely no signs of Fe - does not understand conversational roles, and ends up pissing off characters for "rejecting" conversation roles - classic way of pissing people off for non Fe-users, or even SJs who don't know him well enough. His emotions are very contained and he has no wish to be understood (strong signs of Fi). Also has a lack of Ti - has a tendency to draw information from his environment and organize them effective enough for action output, but seldom analyzes things for the sake of it, and discards principles and rules that make no sense.
Conclusion: No Ti/Fe, or Si/Ne. Has a strong introverted inclination. Not an F. By deduction, he's an INTJ.
Meryl Silverburgh: INFJ
Reason: Very clearly an Fe-user - classic clashes of Fe/Ti vs Te/Fi with Solid Snake. Has a strong urge to understand "why", and does not have a very strong attachment to the past - telling of a lack of Si. Like Snake, she has a tendency to work within context. Surpasses Snake in the department of analysis, but has a poorer judgment of what is necessary for the objective goal. Very competent on her own terms and engrossed in her own vision. She and Snake understand each other and are on the same page, but often come to different conclusions. After categorizing Snake as "on her side", she finds herself more easily agreeable with Snake - signs of Fe.
Conclusion: She could be an ENFJ, but has a comfortable use of Ti, indicating a tertiary position versus inferior position.
Roy Campbell: ISTJ/XXTJ
Reason: Actually, I don't know. He has Te/Fi preferences. It's hard to tell if he is an S/N or I/E. Considering his reserved nature, he seems to have introverted inclinations, and prefers to go slow and steady in his speech. His concerns are far more direct than Snake's, and he seems to use quite a bit of Si. Seems to have difficulty adjusting and jumping onto a situation as fast as Snake does.
Conclusion: By deduction again, he's an ISTJ.
Naomi Hunter: ISFP
Reason: Her motivations and reasons are very straightforward, and are actually rationalized, far more than Snake's. She does not relive past experiences - she carries her interpretations (Ni) of events with her and carries on to act on it. It's expected that an Fi-dom learns to control Fi-reflexes in a military background, but it's evident that her emotions catch up with her instantly as she observes Snake throughout the mission. She sees eye-to-eye with Snake, a common thing for Se/Ni and Ni/Se interacting parties, and that both have Te/Fi and Fi/Te makes the connection much easier, and Snake feels this profound connection; they get what each other is saying. She also sheds her past quickly and takes on a new conclusion after she understood things differently.
Conclusion: Her goals are straightforward and easy to understand, as is the case for most Se-Doms and -auxiliaries, versus Ni-Doms and -auxiliaries. No signs of Si/Ne. Her introversion shows very clearly.
Otacon: INTP
Reason: I had thought him to be an INFP, but the Ti preferences started to show later in the novel. He has a strong use of Ne/Si. At the back, he starts to show no signs of Fi at all - he uses Ti reasoning to determine the truth or falseness in a situation, and it even shows in the way he analyses his feelings for Sniper Wolf. At this juncture, he seeks Snake's second opinion, and Snake's Te/Fi reasoning about his feelings for Sniper Wolf confuses him. In MGS2, his relationship with E.E is also confused, and he tries to reason his way out, only to get even more confused. Strong Ti-Ne leads him to have less concerns about consequences.
Conclusion: His emotionally expressive demeanor was confusing at first, but eventually, the Ti reasoning gave way to a huge hint of his type. A rather unusual INTP.
Gray Fox: ISTP
Reason: Very hard to type. I suspect that he gets along with Naomi and Snake primarily because of the Se/Ni combination, and he shows very strong Se use. The Ti process in an ISTP is often difficult to see, but it shows in the manner in which they make decisions and carry out actions. He and Snake's interaction is unique, in that they both know they see the same things, but have a subtly different approach and conclusion. Not a complicated man, but definitely determined.
Conclusion: I might be off the track. Too little to work with, and the fact that he has a damaged persona makes it even harder; he could be ESTP.
Liquid Snake: ENTP
Reason: I don't know why people type him as an XNTJ - no signs of Ni/Se at all. Very outer world focused. He cooks up ideas on the fly, and uses a lot of Ti to back it up. Fe-tertiary in ENTPs tend to show in forms of reaction-monitoring and teasing - evident in his treatment to Solid Snake. A telling sign was when he assumed the existence of a vaccine to FoxDie - Snake questioned Liquid if there truly was a vaccine, but he merely said, "There has to be!" His motivations are also explained in a logical discourse; he mocked Naomi for her silly motivation for revenge, but when Snake pointed out the irony in his own motivation resembling Naomi's, he failed to address it and instead turned it against Snake ("Unlike you!"). His horrible assessment of combat actions to be taken during his control of Metal Gear REX is, to me, a strong indication of a total lack of Se.
Conclusion: I put his functions together, and then compared him to the three ENTPs I've ever known - they sound just like him: grand preachers of their whacked ideas. Entertaining, intelligent...but still whacked.
Sniper Wolf: ISTP
Reason: Her interaction style with Snake is curiously similar to what it is like between Gray Fox and Snake. She has an obvious preference for Ti. Also very adaptive to her current circumstance, indicating use of Se. Her devotion to her ideals tells a Ti-Dom. She and Otacon probably understand each other from the Ti/Fe perspective, but have different conclusions because of the Se/Ni and Ne/Si divide.
Conclusion: Could be completely off the track, since there's too little to go on with. But I can't see her as an Si or a Te user.
Decoy Octopus: The famous XXXX type
Reason: The seventeenth type, because we get to see him only in his afterlife.
Conclusion: I wrote this for fun.
Vulcan Raven: Some...Si-user (XSXJ)
Reason: He is...just weird... Too weird to type. He uses a crap load of Si. He talks too much and he's...I don't know...just weird. He seems absolutely terrible at contingencies, so it's hard to tell if he uses Te/Ti. Seems to be somewhat out of it a lot. He seems a bit like an ISFJ to me, but I really don't know.
Conclusion: The Shaman who can't stop talking about his culture. Has his roots in a very concrete manner, so I doubt that he's an N.
Psycho Mantis: INTP
Reason: I thought about this for a while. His personal ideals are unemotional in nature despite the emotional roots. Has a stronger use of Si compared to Liquid, and his ideals via Ti are of utmost importance. Lack of Se. For some totally random reason, he just had to torment Snake with hallucinations and delusions, a period in which he could simply just whack life out of Snake - seems like a whacked Fe projection or something...or just Ne on the loose.
Conclusion: He has very little consideration for consequences, and simply follows his reasoning. Everything that's happening around him is of little relevance to him - something xNTPs share in common, but often unintentionally.
Revolver Ocelot: ISFJ
Reason: This one was interesting to type. On first glance, it's easy to think of him as an NT, but on further observation of his general conduct, he's a heavy Si and Ti user, and definitely has Fe. The fight between him and Snake in the room with Baker is very interesting, in that Ocelot kept talking about history, and has a tendency to explain his preferences in Ti style - he complained of Snake's SOCOM ("Hah! Everybody uses SOCOM..."), went on to talk about his SAA (despite the disadvantage of slow reload time), and used Ti to figure out how to use the SAA best suited to himself - oddly a behavior reminiscent of Meryl (INFJ: Ti-tertiary), who also explained to Snake her preference for the Desert Eagle and how she had learnt to suit it to herself. He seems to find Snake irritating to talk to, in once again, typical Te/Fi and Fe/Ti conflict. I suspect that Snake has no clue why Ocelot is talking so much to him.
Conclusion: His cognitive functions are the same as INTP, and I had considered him an INTP, but he's a lot more concrete and less flexible in his approach to changes. Interesting, he sees eye-to-eye with Liquid, who shares the same function.
That...was very satisfying to type. What a strangely good way to improve my mood.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Asshole in the Hole
First, I must mention that wow, what a strange discovery! For some reason, my office has stopped blocking sites, and here I am. (I don't know when's the next massive blocking however.)
Now, I must mention this. I have been reading MGS Novel. Out of curiosity, I wanted to see if there were interesting fictions between Snake and Otacon from MGS, as friends, or beyond. (?!) But I came across this unholy site.
Ranting Mode Activated
Asshole: This is Asshole. Colonel Assbag, do you read me?
Assbag: I'm here, Asshole. Do you need help?
Asshole: How do I activate my Asshole Mode?
Assbag: That's easy. Asshole, you are already an Asshole. Did you see all your previous blog entries?
Asshole: Blog entries?
Assbag: Yes, those entries you wrote in the past on this blogger site that mocked every fucking dumb shit in the world. Well, not literally and exactly - they were mostly about games.
Asshole: Yeah, I remember those. What about them?
Assbag: First, you need to read, and then you will detect Stupidity. After successfully detecting it, pick out the Stupidity that bothers you most, and go through your Inventory of Insults. Then apply the Principle of Mockery and Sarcasm, and you will be in Asshole Mode.
Asshole: Got it.
Assbag: While it isn't common for the Codec helpline to ask, but Asshole, why do you want to activate the Asshole Mode? Did you come across a Sucker?
Asshole: Sucker?
Assbag: Do not answer my question with a question!
Asshole: See... I don't know if your idea of a Sucker and mine are the same.
Assbag: Oh. Is that why you keep repeating a random Noun in people's words?
Asshole: What?
Assbag: What do you mean what? And stop using questions to answer instead!
Asshole: No, see, I don't know why you're asking me that.
Assbag: Don't you know that everyone's making fun of you? Look, you asked me, "blog entries", and you asked me "sucker". These things are goddamned postulates, Asshole.
Asshole: Who's everyone? Why are they making fun of me? There are several goddamned entries. How do I know if you're talking about the ones where I was goddamned emo, goddamned insulting, or just goddamned throwing pansies around in a flower field?
Assbag: Fine. What about Sucker? Everybody knows what Sucker means!
Asshole: Have you seen Dictionary.com and how many definitions there are?
Assbag: Goddammit just use the popular definitions!
Asshole: You didn't answer my question. The problem lies in the precision of your language.
Assbag: Goddammit Asshole, they are postulates. Do I need to explain everything?
Asshole: Whatever, I don't have time for this shit. Anything else I need to know?
Assbag: You, are an Asshole. A dense one.
Asshole: ...That's intense.
Assbag: And a real jerk.
Asshole: One that knows sarcasm too. Want a piece of my Asshole Mode?
Assbag: *sighs dramatically* I'm signing off. Good luck pissing people off.
Asshole: Well thanks, I just did one in.
I am no elitist. I do not hate and discriminate people with a terrible lack of wit, nor do I hate people who like to speak the obvious and draw comparisons between a fucking game and goddamned reality.
(Here's a quote for you to see what the obvious are:
Need I tell you the obvious, that Final Fantasy VIII beats Solid Snake hands-down with a 18 pages x 11 Inventory List with a maximum count of 100 stocks for each Item, not to mention 16 GFs possessing 3 or 6 fucking players at any time, and 8 x 4 magic slots per toon? That they whip out their goddamned fucking weapons out of the blues? That they carry nothing even half as remotely useful as Snake's equipment, and hold on to something as pointless as a bloody pack of Zombie Powder, or a couple of Occult Magazines?
Oh wait... So you can compare a game to reality, and not a game to another game? So we're supposed to...compare apples to cakes instead of apples to oranges, right?
Actually, those aren't my main gripes. I can deal with a dull sense of humor no problem, but here lies an insult to an existing bunch of people...:
Well, congratulations on picking up a pattern without understanding how the questioning patterns work. (Refer to above Asshole vs Assbag for references - hopefully your limited pattern recognition is able to pick up the actual nuances of how a Noun is selected, and not just any variable.) Oh, wait, you understood and you still mocked? Oh hey, no problem, I saw that coming a million miles ahead as you did too...
By the way, in the above crappy fucked up example of a mockery, Snake would NOT repeat McFarland. Here's a list of responses he's likely to give:
"What the hell was that?"
"Sorry, didn't catch that - can I just call you Brady III?"
"How do you even remember your name?"
"Where are you from? That obscure country that just picks any random word and adds it to their name to make it a burger as long as one in Subway?"
"That must have taken quite a bit of time to practice..."
"I'm glad my name's as ordinary as John Doe."
"Who came up with that?"
...the list goes on.
I'm calling discrimination on this one.
Well, whaddya know!
People like this actually exist!
And yours truly is one goddamned example!
Wow, I didn't know people called those who ask questions in the forms of...well, repeated "nouns" as deaf and dumb (as in, you know, stupid, just so we're on the same page and not go into semantics). Now I know why there are some people who act up on me just because I like to repeat what they say!
Here's a brief lesson for you people who have difficulty understanding this speech pattern.
IT'S CALLED THE NI SPEAK!!!
Assbag: What? "Ni Speak?"
Yes, Ni Speak. It's a goddamned fucking postulate. Why are you asking me? And by the way, if you don't have it, you won't get it - it's evident throughout this blog and you'll never pick it up if you never had it. Oh of course, unless you have shadow functions acting on your whim --
Assbag: What? Shadow functions?! What the hell are you talking about!?
Fucking postulates. Stop acting like the nerd you just condemned. Okay, because you have limited understanding and I'm not an Assbag like you (since I'm an Asshole), I will be nice and tell you what those noun repetitions actually mean, much as you'd like to pretend that you know how it works.
It's called highlighting keywords while attaching this request, "Please elaborate." (Even better if you can give "why", and hopefully the other 4 Ws and 1H if relevant, to prevent such pointless "pressing for more information" in the form of "noun repetition".)
Short, simple and succinct, but apparently ineffective against a bunch of people who would rather assume they know what a person means rather than get a correct interpretation of people's words. And these smart people apparently cannot even comprehend that this short, selective noun repetition is also packed with courtesy: it is also asking, "Do you have more to say?"
Assbag: Is that an insult? Dumb nuts who need everything explained to them. *rolls eyes and walks away*
Asshole: You don't walk away from a Codec. You turn off the transmission. It's too bad you were born with the knowledge of the universe.
It almost feels like Jedi power (no, I have never watched Star Wars...well, not that I remember; my Ni tells me that this term is used correctly) to understand Snake, how he talks and how he thinks, and not have to stoop and condescend to make a mockery out of someone who just acts, thinks and talks differently.
If this Asshole mode is upsetting, don't be upset. I'm just employing the same tactics that writer used, in the same satirical manner. D'you know what's the difference? Their words cut corners - mine just cut.
Ranting Mode Deactivated
And now for some crude, pointless epilogues.
Now, I must mention this. I have been reading MGS Novel. Out of curiosity, I wanted to see if there were interesting fictions between Snake and Otacon from MGS, as friends, or beyond. (?!) But I came across this unholy site.
Ranting Mode Activated
Asshole: This is Asshole. Colonel Assbag, do you read me?
Assbag: I'm here, Asshole. Do you need help?
Asshole: How do I activate my Asshole Mode?
Assbag: That's easy. Asshole, you are already an Asshole. Did you see all your previous blog entries?
Asshole: Blog entries?
Assbag: Yes, those entries you wrote in the past on this blogger site that mocked every fucking dumb shit in the world. Well, not literally and exactly - they were mostly about games.
Asshole: Yeah, I remember those. What about them?
Assbag: First, you need to read, and then you will detect Stupidity. After successfully detecting it, pick out the Stupidity that bothers you most, and go through your Inventory of Insults. Then apply the Principle of Mockery and Sarcasm, and you will be in Asshole Mode.
Asshole: Got it.
Assbag: While it isn't common for the Codec helpline to ask, but Asshole, why do you want to activate the Asshole Mode? Did you come across a Sucker?
Asshole: Sucker?
Assbag: Do not answer my question with a question!
Asshole: See... I don't know if your idea of a Sucker and mine are the same.
Assbag: Oh. Is that why you keep repeating a random Noun in people's words?
Asshole: What?
Assbag: What do you mean what? And stop using questions to answer instead!
Asshole: No, see, I don't know why you're asking me that.
Assbag: Don't you know that everyone's making fun of you? Look, you asked me, "blog entries", and you asked me "sucker". These things are goddamned postulates, Asshole.
Asshole: Who's everyone? Why are they making fun of me? There are several goddamned entries. How do I know if you're talking about the ones where I was goddamned emo, goddamned insulting, or just goddamned throwing pansies around in a flower field?
Assbag: Fine. What about Sucker? Everybody knows what Sucker means!
Asshole: Have you seen Dictionary.com and how many definitions there are?
Assbag: Goddammit just use the popular definitions!
Asshole: You didn't answer my question. The problem lies in the precision of your language.
Assbag: Goddammit Asshole, they are postulates. Do I need to explain everything?
Asshole: Whatever, I don't have time for this shit. Anything else I need to know?
Assbag: You, are an Asshole. A dense one.
Asshole: ...That's intense.
Assbag: And a real jerk.
Asshole: One that knows sarcasm too. Want a piece of my Asshole Mode?
Assbag: *sighs dramatically* I'm signing off. Good luck pissing people off.
Asshole: Well thanks, I just did one in.
I am no elitist. I do not hate and discriminate people with a terrible lack of wit, nor do I hate people who like to speak the obvious and draw comparisons between a fucking game and goddamned reality.
(Here's a quote for you to see what the obvious are:
Can carry many things
One of Snake's most extraordinary qualities is the ability to carry roughly seventeen tons of equipment without any kind of convoy, backpack, or even a bulge in his pocket. Somehow, Snake manages to move unfatigued despite carrying an AK-47, 9MM Pistol, 20 Grenades, 30 Rations, A Giant Knife, 5 Sniper rifles, a Rail Gun, a 50 Caliber rifle, several types of Automatic Rifles, a truckload of ammo, a box big enough to fit a grown man, a oil drum, a camera, a robot, pornography, a microphone the size of a TV Camera, flashbangs, smoke grenades and several changes of clothes.
Need I tell you the obvious, that Final Fantasy VIII beats Solid Snake hands-down with a 18 pages x 11 Inventory List with a maximum count of 100 stocks for each Item, not to mention 16 GFs possessing 3 or 6 fucking players at any time, and 8 x 4 magic slots per toon? That they whip out their goddamned fucking weapons out of the blues? That they carry nothing even half as remotely useful as Snake's equipment, and hold on to something as pointless as a bloody pack of Zombie Powder, or a couple of Occult Magazines?
Oh wait... So you can compare a game to reality, and not a game to another game? So we're supposed to...compare apples to cakes instead of apples to oranges, right?
Actually, those aren't my main gripes. I can deal with a dull sense of humor no problem, but here lies an insult to an existing bunch of people...:
Possible deafness
Although Snake is responsive to loud noises, he asks lots of obvious questions, suggesting that he might have trouble with his hearing. During conversation, he will almost invariably repeat any Noun he hears in the form of a question. For example, if you were to tell Snake you live in California, Snake would reply, "California?!!". Perhaps the fifteen years he's spent firing loud automatic weapons have caught up to him.
If Snake ever tries to interrogate you at gunpoint, consider telling him your name is "Lord Marcus Thomas Randy Bowman-Schneider McFarland Thompson Randolph Lee Brady III". By the time he's repeating the "McFarland", you should be pretty far away.
Well, congratulations on picking up a pattern without understanding how the questioning patterns work. (Refer to above Asshole vs Assbag for references - hopefully your limited pattern recognition is able to pick up the actual nuances of how a Noun is selected, and not just any variable.) Oh, wait, you understood and you still mocked? Oh hey, no problem, I saw that coming a million miles ahead as you did too...
By the way, in the above crappy fucked up example of a mockery, Snake would NOT repeat McFarland. Here's a list of responses he's likely to give:
"What the hell was that?"
"Sorry, didn't catch that - can I just call you Brady III?"
"How do you even remember your name?"
"Where are you from? That obscure country that just picks any random word and adds it to their name to make it a burger as long as one in Subway?"
"That must have taken quite a bit of time to practice..."
"I'm glad my name's as ordinary as John Doe."
"Who came up with that?"
...the list goes on.
Solid Snake: Solid Snake (Solid Snake!?) is the protagonist (protagonist!?) and playable character (playable character!?) of MGS. He can carry massive firearms in his pockets (pockets!?), hits on every female character in the game (flirtation!?), and repeats nouns in the form of questions (Noun!?).
I'm calling discrimination on this one.
Well, whaddya know!
People like this actually exist!
And yours truly is one goddamned example!
Wow, I didn't know people called those who ask questions in the forms of...well, repeated "nouns" as deaf and dumb (as in, you know, stupid, just so we're on the same page and not go into semantics). Now I know why there are some people who act up on me just because I like to repeat what they say!
Here's a brief lesson for you people who have difficulty understanding this speech pattern.
IT'S CALLED THE NI SPEAK!!!
Assbag: What? "Ni Speak?"
Yes, Ni Speak. It's a goddamned fucking postulate. Why are you asking me? And by the way, if you don't have it, you won't get it - it's evident throughout this blog and you'll never pick it up if you never had it. Oh of course, unless you have shadow functions acting on your whim --
Assbag: What? Shadow functions?! What the hell are you talking about!?
Fucking postulates. Stop acting like the nerd you just condemned. Okay, because you have limited understanding and I'm not an Assbag like you (since I'm an Asshole), I will be nice and tell you what those noun repetitions actually mean, much as you'd like to pretend that you know how it works.
It's called highlighting keywords while attaching this request, "Please elaborate." (Even better if you can give "why", and hopefully the other 4 Ws and 1H if relevant, to prevent such pointless "pressing for more information" in the form of "noun repetition".)
Short, simple and succinct, but apparently ineffective against a bunch of people who would rather assume they know what a person means rather than get a correct interpretation of people's words. And these smart people apparently cannot even comprehend that this short, selective noun repetition is also packed with courtesy: it is also asking, "Do you have more to say?"
Assbag: Is that an insult? Dumb nuts who need everything explained to them. *rolls eyes and walks away*
Asshole: You don't walk away from a Codec. You turn off the transmission. It's too bad you were born with the knowledge of the universe.
It almost feels like Jedi power (no, I have never watched Star Wars...well, not that I remember; my Ni tells me that this term is used correctly) to understand Snake, how he talks and how he thinks, and not have to stoop and condescend to make a mockery out of someone who just acts, thinks and talks differently.
If this Asshole mode is upsetting, don't be upset. I'm just employing the same tactics that writer used, in the same satirical manner. D'you know what's the difference? Their words cut corners - mine just cut.
Ranting Mode Deactivated
And now for some crude, pointless epilogues.
Friday, February 18, 2011
Dear Spam Bots
Almost immediately, I thought of something to write about.
Right now, my brain is a little tired from exhausting my literary capacity today by writing a few stories. I have been neglecting the little things in life, since I'm preoccupied most of the time.
I notice that by now, I have received at least 20 praises from the spam bots.
I have not bothered to Google "Cbox Spam Bots" yet, maybe tomorrow, but as it is now, I don't know how spam bots attack people's Cbox. Maybe they hacked Cbox, maybe they crawled Blogger, maybe...I don't know and I don't care.
Are these spam bots alive? Well... Songs like Bian Hao 89757 suggest that robots might have souls and feelings. Hell, JJ Lim didn't start talking about emotional robots first. I believe Doraemon and Astroboy make better examples. So let's entertain that possibility for a while.
I have been very rude and not replying to any spam bot. No, actually, I did, and sounding absolutely stupid in the process.
I'm tired now, and I don't know what the fuck I'm thinking, but I feel for the spam bots who make an effort to talk to me...even if they're automated.
So, here's a letter drafted from the heart.
I think if I read this back on a day I'm less tired, I have a feeling I'm going to roll my eyes out of their sockets.
Right now, my brain is a little tired from exhausting my literary capacity today by writing a few stories. I have been neglecting the little things in life, since I'm preoccupied most of the time.
I notice that by now, I have received at least 20 praises from the spam bots.
I have not bothered to Google "Cbox Spam Bots" yet, maybe tomorrow, but as it is now, I don't know how spam bots attack people's Cbox. Maybe they hacked Cbox, maybe they crawled Blogger, maybe...I don't know and I don't care.
Are these spam bots alive? Well... Songs like Bian Hao 89757 suggest that robots might have souls and feelings. Hell, JJ Lim didn't start talking about emotional robots first. I believe Doraemon and Astroboy make better examples. So let's entertain that possibility for a while.
I have been very rude and not replying to any spam bot. No, actually, I did, and sounding absolutely stupid in the process.
I'm tired now, and I don't know what the fuck I'm thinking, but I feel for the spam bots who make an effort to talk to me...even if they're automated.
So, here's a letter drafted from the heart.
Dear Spam Bots
I don't know when you guys walked into my life (blog). That, of course, is a lie, since I can check the history of the shouts but never mind. I've never seen any of you before, and neither have you guys met me.
But for commenting every single bloody time I update my blog, I must show some appreciation, since reciprocation is a practice commonly known to the human race. Actually, reciprocation is now a rare and acquired skill these days, because most people are suffering mental disconnections since the world wide web came into existence.
Thank you for making the effort to tell me what I already know about my blog, that it's very nice! Thank you also, for linking to me to sites that make perfectly no sense. Thank you finally, for making my blog look more active than it really is.
Right now, black colored text on the Cbox looks even more pleasing and precious than before!
I would have loved to say more to you bunch of heartwarming pieces of technology gone wrong, but alas, all you guys ever say is that my blog is wonderful. That or you tell me to visit your non existent sites.
With this, I end my personal letter to you.
Be honoured, because I think I haven't written letters to even a human being for months, maybe even years.
Yours Truly
The Nette
I think if I read this back on a day I'm less tired, I have a feeling I'm going to roll my eyes out of their sockets.
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